It has been 11 months plus 1 day since I had my mid-mid-life crisis moment and chopped my hair off. I used to have long hair; actually for my entire life had long hair. Long, so long. To be fair, I have enjoyed the short hair for the majority of the year. But over the past few months I’ve started to realize that maybe it’s time I grew it out again.
For one, when I picture myself in my head, I have long hair. When I picture my future, it is a future graced by the presence of long hair.
Two. I am convinced now more than ever before that I have a long-hair-personality.
Three: the thought of having short hair for much longer makes me want to cry.
Four: many of my bedtime prayers are now infused with some form of “Oh God, God of miracles and wonders, could I just wake up with long hair?”
The kicker, though, came this morning at my local coffee shop on my once-per-weekly coffee run. I was waiting at the side for my half-caf-caramel-infused beverage, when she walked in: the woman with the most beautiful hair I’ve ever seen. It was almost poetic it was so pretty; it cascaded and tumbled down to the middle of her back in it’s chestnut-brown glory…and it was natural, to boot. Hmpft. This must be why God invented those Bible verses about coveting your neighbor. My heart stopped, my jaw dropped, and embarrassingly enough, she turned around and caught me staring. I decided it might ease the embarrassment if I just said something to her, so while we were both at the coffee-prep counter I (feeling more than ever like an awkward teenager beside the graceful beauty with a mane of golden locks), I asked her if her hair was naturally like that. She was actually shocked that I asked her! I said, “wow, don’t you get comments all the time?” and she said that no, she didn’t. (She seemed happy to receive the compliment, which also makes me feel less like a dork for bringing it up. Even girls with perfect hair need validation sometimes). I decided that people in general must be intimidated, although I didn’t say that out loud. I just smiled as best I could and made a cheery exit.
Beautiful lioness: +500
Gangly Introspective: -2
(*point system is based on hair alone)
So that settles it. I’m going to grow my hair out. Maybe hibernating will make it grow faster…or some kind of herbal remedy? Fervent prayers, the laying on of hands? Hmm…