Wednesday, July 28, 2010


Maybe it would be better for you if I kept all my thoughts in my head. But it wouldn't be better for me. So here we go, another list of twenty things I've been thinking about recently.

1. A Jerry Can kept in the trunk is a good investment. An even better investment? Filling up the gas tank on time.

2. My budget would be better served in someone else’s hands. Dear Jesus: how are you at banking?

3. I’ve decided that it’s probably a good thing I don’t have a camera, because I’d probably get stuck behind it, and people probably wouldn’t recognize me anymore without the black box in front of my face.

4. I know of a girl who is dating a guy who is dating lots of other girls. Even though she knows it, she stays. It’s a sad day we live in, that girls date guys that don’t really like them and guys date girls they don’t really like.

5. My good friend and I decided that we wanted to blow off some steam recently, and so went dancing. It worked, but I was surprised at how thrillingly hilarious a pub could be. Between the liquidcourageous-butstillentertaining pickup attempts, dranksomuchithinkimfunny dance moves, and frequent “ohdeargodivebeendroppedintoapiranhatank” dance floor moments, it was one of the funniest nights I’ve had all year. No offence to the drunk people who will be the stars of my mocking stories for years to come.

6. I’m trying to remember what we all did before facebook came along; though it’s been quite a challenge…wait…I’m getting a vision of things past…did we…noo…there was actual face to face interaction!? A necessity for social skill? REGULAR HUMAN CONTACT!? Shocking. How could we tell who our friends were without those blue buttons? What did we do with all the hundreds of pictures of ourselves? How did we brag share about our wonderful fulfilling lives with every person we've met since birth? Oh, we didn’t? Oh. Well then… what did we do?

7. Being wanted is more calming a remedy for the heart than simply being had, just as being with someone is better than being beside them.

8. I’d really like to live until I’m 95. No, 100. No point in making it all the way to 95 and croaking; may as well go all the way with it.

9. The honest truth about my life is that I don’t regret anything; I just don’t do things I will regret. The only choice I’ve ever made that goes against that philosophy is the time in elementary school when I did not hold the boa constrictor that visited our classroom. I’ve honestly thought about it for years, and every time I think about it a little twinge of something (regret?) pokes my heart and I am momentarily saddened. Thankfully, I’ve been able to remedy the situation. This weekend at the beach, there was a hippie with a boa constrictor and he let me hold it on my shoulders, and it was just as beautiful as I thought it would be. I even got a picture with it. My one regret in life has been satisfied – a feeling well worth the $2 donation to a stranger’s money jar. This has gotten me thinking that most of what we call “regret” can likely be fixed with the simplest of actions.

10. Everyone’s too cool to enjoy something, but nobody is too cool to enjoy fireworks, and that’s exactly why I like them.

11. Dear Saggy-Old-Lady-on-the-beach-in-the-fishnet-stockings-and-wet-seethrough-undergarments-and-nothing-else: I will remember you forever. You have left your mark on the world. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go stare intently and at close range into a bright light.

12. Just last year I think, I was driving and my sister Holly was in the passenger seat. We’re just cruising along listening to music and chatting. At one point Holly reaches into her purse and starts fishing around, and I start to say (as I’m looking at the road in front of me) “Oh you know what would be SOOO GOOD right now??? One of those kinder cho…!” and the sentence didn't even make it out of my mouth as I looked at my sister: she’s holding one of those specific types of kinder chocolates out for me, with an odd sort of smile on her face – apparently, she too thought that one of those kinder chocolates would be sooo good right now and had gone into her purse to get one (where she just happened to have a few stashed). Without even knowing it, we had thought the exact same thing at the exact same time. I hope I explained that right, because it’s moments like this that make me believe in God’s sense of humor.

13. Faith without doubt is like chocolate without cacao – fake, and pointless.

14. It’s easy to judge the person until you become the person.

15. You know, if my follow through was even half as good as my Intentions, I’d be the most accomplished person on the planet. With the most friends. And the most home businesses.

16. I live in a vacation spot. …no that’s it, that’s all I wanted to say.

17. Pessimism: I just sliced my foot open on barnacles. Optimism: …on the sunniest most relaxing day of my personal history.

18. If most of my stories end with “yah… I guess you had to be there,” does this mean my life is boring, or that I’m just a bad story teller?

19. I think it’s funny that people will tell you that you’re a “one in a million” kind of person until the exact moment you buy a lottery ticket.

20. There’s a time to laugh and a time to cry… and a time to bring me a cookie. That time is now.


anita said...

This was the loveliest last-thing-I-read-before-falling-asleep that I've read in a long time. I will dream with a happy smile on my lips. Thank you.

Anonymous said...

i. love. your. sense. of. humour. ps-you misspelled cocoa. but i still love you. :) holly

Mama said...

I love these. I am number 15. Your blog is my home page. I adore you and miss you.
Love Mama ♥