Saturday, March 22, 2014

hello?

Peeking my head above water briefly to say: there are a lot of things happening and I can almost manage to do them all. In order to accomplish everything, I've been giving my sleep-hours away to the Universe; someone else can use them, I just don't have time. I've been laughing a lot, because laughter drains the tub a bit. Thankfully, I've got a love who wraps me in joy and humor on the double when I'm stressed out. When that doesn't work, he wraps me in hugs. That always works.

I've been taking juggling lessons, dance lessons, get-up-and-hop-to-it lessons. I've been stacking, combing, stirring and setting down. Our schedule and to-do lists have lit their overloaded circuits on fire, and it's a good thing, even if it means the floors don't get swept quite as often. Because there's so much to do, there's much to notice. Nothing quite like Busy to make you squeeze a moment for all it's worth. Madness makes the quiet minutes poignant, slower; fresh dewdrops on the dawn of another busy day. Here we go, Love, I'm ready because you are. That look you give me will get me through the day.

I've been trying to figure out how to administrate life, to organize, to get done, all the while taking pauses to enjoy the things that can't be scheduled or re-scheduled: Darling Six's laughs and stories, Dog's admiring glances and longings to be nose-to-shin, the neverending need I have to be close to my love, to hear his thoughts on the day. Even though there's laundry to fold and hours to spend tasking, these little pieces make it all worthwhile. Those pieces aren't little at all, either, they are in fact the driving force for much of our lives. I love you, so I will accomplish. I love our family, so I will do. I love who we are together, so I will put my stuff down and snuggle you to sleep. Then I'll stay up late, find those hours I couldn't find earlier, because I want your life to be good.

Looking ahead, the race and the rush don't show any signs of stopping. But, as we walk (or run), we learn to find a balance between the musts & pauses, lists & freeform moments.

It is a good thing, learning to swim like this.



Lauren Bacall & Leslie Bogart © Phil Stern



Playlist:
Penguin Cafe Orchestra: Perpetuum Mobile
Lord Huron: She Lit a Fire, Time to Run, Brother


2 comments:

Mama said...

Well, I hate to be a typical Mother here on a public page, but alas, I must...please, Dear Heart, do get enough sleep - 8 to 9 hours of sleep each night is what's required, you can google that....and chronic fatigue....and what a serious lack of sleep can do to us. Of course, if you are already achieving this, then please disregard this notice.

afterthoughtcomposer said...

always looking out for me :) xoxox